19/01/2018
Psalms 139:8 a
‘If I ascend into heaven, You (are) there; If I make my bed in hell, behold, you (are there).
Today is my late sister, Rosaline’s birthday (19/Jan). It was like yesterday when Beatrice, my youngest sister called from Taipei saying that Rosaline passed away at 2 AM in the hospital, on 20/07/2008. She was bravely fighting her cancer for years, and she was in and out of the hospital for months prior her passing, but I was not prepared for it. Today I want to pour my heart to give thanks to Jesus, for her life and for knowing where she is right now.
I was in much despair and sobbing for hours. Because I fractured my left Patella bone just a few days before she passed away, which meant that I wouldn’t be able to travel to attend her funeral; and Rosaline had been a practicing Buddhist for years so that I was not going to see her for eternity. In tears, I went for my devotion. On that morning, the title was ‘‘Expiration Date‘ on ‘Our Daily Bread (1)‘ dated 20/July/2008, scripture readings were from Psalm 139:7-8.
Literally, the scripture promised that even if Rosaline made her bed in hell, my dear Lord would be there for her. But I refused to be comforted. I cried whenever I had her on my mind. She was never married, stayed on to the same job for over 30-years, and she was fighting for her cancer for 5-years. Yet among us, she was the first to obtain a university degree, the first to get her drivers’ license, she was a gifted artist in Chinese painting and super level-headed. What really cut into my heart was when I found out that in her remaining hours, in the hospital, she grabbed hold of Beatrice’ hands in tears.
We had 4 girls and one brother, Tony in the family when our mother passed away, nothing was the same. I was the first to leave home, in early 70’s for Hong Kong. Our father was the trying single parent for 6-years. But when he remarried, all of my siblings were scattered, and Beatrice had to be in the boarding school. Rosaline had been my only link to the family. Suddenly I remembered that I was told that she used to be on fire and worshipped at the local Seventh Day Adventist Church, and she was often ridiculed for keeping the religious dietary(2) in the family. Later, she had a sharp turn in her faith.
What I didn’t know was it a coincidence or not that our mother died at the Taipei Seventh Day Adventist Hospital? So I called and cried bitterly on the long distance call, talking to her former classmate, Hsu Ze Fu, a devoured Christian. And she comforted me saying that she believed that Rosaline might have been saved. And a few weeks before I was fit to travel, the beautiful Hsu Ze Fu called and told me that she went to the church and managed to locate Rosaline’s baptism record. She was baptized in August 1978. Unfortunately, my despair went more in-depth, as she turned away from her first love for Jesus.
The following Sunday, I met our Chinese pastor, Rev. Cheng near the fellowship hall, in the church. Before I could utter a word, I felt so broken and crying beyond consoling. And he gently pads on my shoulder saying that ‘ yes, you told me that your sister may have left the Lord to another god. But your Lord of God, Jesus had never left your sister.…’ Immediately, I felt so ashamed of being weak and shallow, and I was entirely in awe of HIS steadfast faithfulness and telling myself that even if I couldn’t make it to the funeral that’s fine.
As for the funeral, from either the late July or early August onward usually fall into the ‘hungry ghost ‘ month in line with the Chinese calendar. For all sorts of reasons, some people would defer having the funeral. So the siblings had decided to take heed of what the local funeral planner had proposed to postpone the funeral till the ‘Ghosts’ month was over. And the scheduled date was exactly the date that my doctor gave me the green light to travel, but I have to go in a wheelchair. I got all the preferential treatments in a wheelchair in and out the airport.
I made it on time to Rosaline’s funeral, gave a eulogy, I was not bothered by the format of the funeral but most importantly, I knew where would Rosaline, my most beloved sister be. I read out the same scriptures in the gospel of (John 14:1-3) (3) that I used for our own father’s funeral, 9-months ago, when he was called to be with Jesus, that same year. I was moved to see buses load of her business associates turned up for her, a few young people also came to bid her farewell. In my emotion, I always thought that Rosaline had an unfulfilled life on earth, maybe because she was never married, but she was given opportunities to impact many people; had had a few good friends; was respected at her workplace, and she would always be deeply missed among her siblings.
In the light of faith, I was pointed to the following that helps me in remembrance of Rosaline’s 3rd anniversary of her passing, and I am confident that it would bring comfort to many who are in the grief of the loss of their loved ones.
‘From Him, who loves me now so well. What power my soul can sever? Shall life or death, or earth or hell? No..I am His forever,’ Stebbins
Our Daily Bread date 20/07/2011
The Light Of Faith 